Pet Peeves

Ok, this really doesn’t merit documentation, but I have the time so what the heck



These are a few of my not so favourite things

1. People who say “helloes” instead of “hello”:



Why oh why the superfluous salutations? One is enough I say. What joy is there to be gained from the use of the plural? It is ungrammatical and downright annoying. Maybe my vehemence stems from an inexplicable wariness of overly gregarious people. But even if you are competing in the popularity sweepstakes such tactics are unforgivable in my book. If it were me I’d stick to “hello hello..”. Just say it twice, it won’t kill you.

2. Men who sit cross-legged:



Ok this is a confession from my irrational and rather sexist side. I don’t know what it is about boys crossing their legs but it really grosses me out. I’m ashamed of my prejudices but getting rid of them is easier said than done. Perakath had an interesting theory for my condition. He said that men who cross their legs unconsciously handicap themselves in the department of… well… ahem… how does one say this…ah yes: reproduction. So by rejecting boys who do opt for the said objectionable style of sitting I am merely overlooking a poor mating prospect. Merely looking out for the best candidate for perpetuation of the species. Merely submitting to natural instinct.
I really wish the explanation were as rational as all that. To be honest I just think its a slightly “girly” way to sit. I suppose there is some truth to the whole “hunt for Alpha male” theory. But the reasons appear to be more aesthetic than biological.

3. People who wear rings:



Again, I can’t quite explain this one. Perhaps it can be traced back to some traumatic experience such as an inability to wear previously purchased rings due to disproportionate weight gain of fingers (don’t go there… its a sore topic). Or maybe my general disgust for people who believe in lucky stones and the like. Wedding/engagement rings are forgivable (even if on the hand of a particularly good looking man, after initial disappointment of course). But unless you have a solid reason for wearing one (no, “fashion” does not qualify as a valid explanation) the sub-conscious me is just going to hold it against you for ever. No kidding, I’ve even steered clear of reading Lord of the Rings (though the ample girth of the book may have played a crucial role in the decision)

4. Wardrobe related queries:



I hate it when people ask me why I am “dressed up”. It annoys me no end. Because the tacit implication is always that it is for the benefit of boys or boy in particular. Now I like boys as much as any other girl (us unfortunate heterosexual folk that is) but to think that I budget time from my busy schedule to preen myself for them is just plain insulting. Did the thought ever cross your feeble little minds that I like “dressing up” for me? That I like celebrating the fact that I own nice clothes. That I like to further celebrate the fact that I think I am beautiful. I celebrate it every day, even if it is in dirty jeans and shapeless uninspiring t-shirts.

Ok I’ve exhausted my stock of diatribes for the day. And I enjoyed putting it down. I hope it makes for good reading, even if slightly bitchy, low brow entertainment.